GET'N BUSY ON FRIDAY THE 13th

There are no bath salts secondary effects that can be compared to a night on Friday the 13th when violence met poetry.  Last Friday the Museo de Arte Contemporáneo de Puerto Rico was the host of a terrific get together of exquisite corpses of crème de la crème poets. The host was brief cold about what was in store. The purpose: listening how a group of honorable artists of the cutting edge word portrayed their own nightmares through their own and unique metaphoric boo hoos. Jason was not around but Lyn is pretty sure that if he had been present he would have, at some point, struck his ax right in the middle of the podium. There was sexy corpse stories by Monsieur Rafah Acevedo, oozing funny punch lines by Mademoiselle Nicole Cecilia Delgado, a rotting zombie murmur by John Torres, a scary movie by Aurea Maria Sotomayor and brightful sequins being dragged in the dark by Angel Antonio among other hell raising stories. 

The reason for that freaky evening was to have a blood toast with Carlos Rivera Villafañe's exhibition "Manifestaciones de lo humano", a visual and horrorific voyage through the artists apocalyptical visions in our day by day reality encounters with death and violence. "Poetry is busy: poemas demasiado humanos" put together by Madame Yara Liceaga is a hair raising effort to keep poetry alive and screaming within the main stream walls of a museum that is constantly running for it's survival. Lyn is pretty sure that the Museum curator Madame Lilliana Ramos Collado has been essential part of these violent strategies to keep the institution away from the claws of slow rot away.

"Pistola en concreto". Carlos Rivera Villafañe. 1996

Thank God it was only Friday and at some point it was going to be over to give way to Saturday. The next day Lyn woke up to realize that the night before was not scary enough, that the newspapers were still delivering the worst nightmares with the difference that the perpetrators of the stories did not have the grace to tell them the way that la crème de la crème poets would do.

Click! Click! FLASH FLASH: Between fast food rubbish and loose ends

Big MAC will never be looked at the same way after Lyns visit. Now we are talking high rolling slow digestive visions with more than a million desires served. Hurry while the combo offer lasts! This time and 4 the first time, for a minimum fee, u can obtain 2 thingies 4 the price of one, a family size oferta served by LaChapelle and LittleChapel. Thus Lyn is not talking about any junk foodie…Lyn mean flashy, BIG, and famously outrageous, very similar to our innermost desires.

Trailer park project. Jason Mena

Talking about the LittleChapel Lyn stumbled upon a little wagon and it was such a provocative dare that Lyn had to hop into the ride to see what was in store. A very gentle gentleman took Lyn by the hand and helped her enter into the guaguita where an array of random images was neatly arranged. The gentle gentleman told Lyn that the creator of these images, Mr. Jason Mena, was probably “the second most important famous artist in Puerto Rico” and he started to number a series of curricular stuff to convince Lyn that YES! This guaguita was for real and that Lyn had the privilege for taking a ride in it. Lyn was told that the photographyator takes the pictures algarete, random snap shots of graffiti, walls and street stuff while the famous creator travels around the globe…this guy is a genius! Off course it is like a tripleta wagon ready to fill your hunger even if u get a stomach ache at 3:00 in da morning.

Sofía Cáceres Nazario. That summer. Chromogenic print mounted on sintra

After the guaguita gentle gentleman forgot about Lyns presence, and hopping off at the next stop was almost a catastrophe falling down from Lyns high heels, a beautiful sighting full of rubbish and heavenly light stroke Lyns retina. Some young groupie of this kinda visions recommended Lyn to look for Mademoiselle Sofía Cáceres shrine and Lyn decided to faithfully believe this guy because the face of Sofía was so young and beautiful like a milagro about to happen at this place. There was the miracle right in a corner, like the way miracles happen unexpectedly. A mysterious guy on his way out of a room full of trashy stuff was about to cross a doorway where the most beautiful illumination was flooding the garbage room. If this miracle does not make anyone to be a believer get ready cause that means the world is coming to and end, sooner than we expect.

Camilo Carrión. Ballons and cotton candy.

Inkject print on vinyl

On the way out of the Big MAC Lyn encountered a sticky stuff that left her skirt full of loose end threads: A pink glass window full of cotton candy by Monsieur Camilo Carrión… umju! It was a happy vision as Lyn walked the land of broken dreams. Lyn had to hurry and had to take the vision to go, through the drive through window before some lady grabbed her from the last string hanging from the skirt.

This famous local, the Big MAC, is working hard to go global places against all odds. The catastrophic visions stored inside this lovely place are like a message of artful implosion telling Lyn that the blingful life is a wonderful ride. C’mon! Hop in and dare to take a look straight to the eyes of algaretismo and desires, aaAAAAANYWAYS what is the worst that could happen?! Just a little crash against reality that will leave you with the whitest orbit smile you can ever get…u know?!

709529 LOVE STRUCK: When obsession wears nail polish

Photo by Norma Vila.

The memoirs of a lonesome lady searching for Love and desire over and under her nails is probably one of the most striking visions one can ever behold. Lyn just attended a fascinating motion picture that left her breathless and forgetting that by the end of the movie the salty flavor between her lips was not coming from the pop corn but, without noticing, it was coming from biting and chewing her own nails. In this story, a terrified girly named Solimar, lost in the search for the love of deceased pop and ma, walked and walked and walked miles in the retrieve of a soft spot in her golden heart but what she found left her heart colder that a snow storm falling by a seashore. Throughout the story Lyn walked through the land of broken dreams and had visions of many things, certain familiar places in Lyns heart and eyes.

Madame actress Tisha Tikina Burgos hugged and broke Lyns heart with her suppa characterization of Solimar. Monsieur Pantojas, Solimar's Best Girla …what can Lyn say…was Monsieur Pantojas, and everybody Loves Pantojas no matter what. Miranda Purcell who played Kishas character when she was very young stole Lyns heart and threw it away letting it float for a while like a flavorful life saver candy. Actress Madame Dolores Pedro played Perpetue, the wife of bad boy Roberto, and Roberto’s Mother actress Rosie Berrido, was The Motherload of talent that for a moment produced in the theatre the sound of hundred chuckling oysters with her matriarchal attitude but also made you stick your fingernails to your soft velvet seat when goings went tough with her. Actor Ivan Camilo characterized Roberto a Dominican Papi who plays the role of Perpetue’s husband and/or Solimar lover and judging for his looks no wonder somebody would chase him like a bug hitting the dead end of a neon electrified lamp.

The music for this movie is the hippest of all. Lyn will be waitin for a soundtrack to come to a near shoppin mall. It includes Divalicious Rita Indiana and Sylvia Rexach among other jewels of Caribbean composer singers and writers. Can’t wait to watch som people dancing to the rhythm of electronic bachata/merengue and som boleros while getting their own nails done. This could become a cult soundtrack that even Almodovar would buy and start chewing his own nails thinkink “damn! Why didn’t I…!

The end of the girly/women story called UNDER MY NAILS is unexpected, exactly the same way Love leaves you sometimes. Once Lyn heard someone say, “Blessed are they who expect nothing because everything is profit”, and believe Lyn, this wonderful movie has all the potential to grab u and take u places without your own consent so just be aware of every single detail you watch and hear and feel. The rest will be Puerto Rican motion picture history and that Lyn will hopefully be seeing in a close future like… right NOW. Two thumbs up with lovely well-done manicures to Tisha Tikina Burgos, Ari Maniel Cruz and da rest of the producers.

CHUMALACATERA MAQUINOLANDERA: The hippest BEST kept secret in town

"no me hables tanta bobera/ no seas tan pamplinera/ estoy plantando bandera " - Ismael Rivera

Certainly Cafetín El Reyno @ Corona St. is the place where Lyn can find many services @ once. This wonderland *cafetin owned by Don Tony, the Godfather of Love and chichaito, is for sure one of the places where Lyn have felt the happiest of moments dancin in the streets with way better steps than Bowie and Jagger. 

Located in the truest space, within the neighborhood where Maelo grew up and skiddadle to another world, El Reyno promises you more than blissful heavenly canecas of chichaito and the best vellonera music dressed up like an Ipod showing of buttylicious mamisongas while you can play from Ismael Riveras greatest HITS to outta this world Enanitos Verdes.  The drinks can be bought through a little tiny winy window from the outside of the building or you can walk inside and have a ball playing pool on top of a beautiful blue table. Drinks are cheap and neighbor’s hugs and smiles are priceless. Talking about neighbors, YESS, they are the best service you can get over there. When these folks get their Bomba drums and tumbadoras gettoutoffdaway. Besides the truest smiles and hugs you will ever receive you can also get all the best  kept secrets in town starting from love, passion and even how to clean your undies or white gowns to get the whitest of whites while you listen to La Lupe and watch some dudes holding a limbo stick...this is sirius matter and do not expect to be able to attend all these happenings in one night, it is only possible for a local to multitask into this matters. 

Don Tony, the almighty of El Reyno, is a miracle of Love and Lyn knows 4 a fakt. Last time Lyn visited the cafetín Don Tony was not around and was heavily missed. Instead his Dear Family was attending business, as usual, with the same Love and affection that they have inherited from The Patriarch. The example of this is obvious because through the years this heavenly place that have witnessesd joy and mishaps is still for Lyn the best kept secret in town and that Lyn knows for sure when she sees Moorish and Christians dancing together to the rhythm of an anonymous maquinolandera that offers the best she can give u including hughs, kisses and the truest hand slaps you will EVER receive.

*As a matter of fakt Lyn have never seen a coffee machine @ Cafetín El Reyno...Lyn have never missed it anyways...u know?!

FACHANISTA INFILTRATION

Dear friends here Lyn give u a juicy insight. The world off fashion  histery will be written before and after Lyn infiltration inside the world of LE MOD. Our Dear Chief Editor, Nancy Cuebas, has just created a LOVELY videoartpromo utilizing Lyn Famous image. U be da judge. This Lovely Nancy really knows how to pull strings and make her own fashion music...u know?!...je pense...je sais pas?!

CULINARY HIGHLIGHTS: Let them eat cookiecakes even if it's so good that they won't last

Enjoy this Saturday snack. Crossroadscookiecakes are awesome specially when they are eaten and gone.

ENTROPY: Conversation about conversating about the Business of Science and Art in a Global World that leave u thinkin what da hell am I doin here

Lyn recently assisted to a lovely conversation in Metroplataforma organizada which is a hip getoguedaplace for cool artists like moi. During this talk-o-rama conversation Lyn had an epiphany: Artists make Art therefore they are. It was a global reunion and the moderator Mr. Castrodad was so nice to present the happening preceded by an insightful dialogue between Mr. Artist Sebastian Vallejo and Mr. Gorgeous Ralph Vázquez. The globalization of the conversation was guided in Lyns FAVORITE language, broken English English". It was a methodic chaos between Sebastian Vallejo and Gorgeous Ralph very well organized, Lyn might call it glittery entropy. 

The spectators were speechless with such a profound chemical romance between art and science. The business of art was an issue because when artists try 2 enter the business rat race THAT is the greatest off experiments. Mr. Sebastian knows that for a fact and Globalization is the formula...LYN KNEW IT! Picasso came to the panorama as the young artist perfect example of fame and success 2 b followed since Mr. Pablo was a precursor, as Vallejo mentioned and considers, because nobody talks about famous Picasso as the Spaniard artist but as the *Wonderful Global artist.

Charming Sebastian talked about the fact that being the kiddy of a famous Puerto Rican local artist painter is not an easy thing 2 swallow. The shadows of papa doc haunt him and step on his tender heels day and night and even make him get into a wrestling contest against copycatism. It is a BIG issue hard 2 get over with but this kiddo will be ok...Lyn think...Lyn pense...Lyn sais pas!

For a while we heard more artyfakts from the beautiful words of Mr. Ralph full of very important academic data and lablyngo. It was a very helpful presentation from his part, 2 bad no scientists were around. Lyn is pretty sure these absent scientists missed a historic dissertation about art and science.

For a long a while Lyn heard and heard and herd the sheeps of wordily artistic expression even though she missed Miss Collado insight on the theme.

It was a fancy talk that evening and Lyn came out of that scientific chaos platform kinda informed about the business of science and art. On the way out of the platform door, where the experiment took place, Lyn found a very confused Lady that told Lyn that she believed in the national language of art and that left Lyn thinking and scratching her head 4 a while. The Lady was a glamorous museum expert and Lyn told her that it was ok 2 b confused, that what had happened there was a necessary entropy that makes this business of art B what ever it will B will B.

 *Boys and Gials artists 2 B, take note on this scientific formula.